Create A Resilience Reservoir During Difficult Times
Written by Linda Mitchell, a transition coach and founder of Living Inspired Coaching
How do we stay resilient during unusually difficult times? Resiliency is one of those skills that requires you to struggle or falter a bit in order to hone the skill of bouncing back. The more hurdles you face and conquer, the more resiliency you’ll naturally develop. Adopting a healthy, feel-good routine will boost your resiliency and your immunity at the same time! Here are some helpful practices:
Engage in a gratitude practice. Don’t just do it haphazardly, choose a day of the week or a regular time each day to write down a few things for which you are grateful. Challenge yourself to never repeat an entry. After a few weeks you’ll have a beautiful gratitude list to serve as a wonderful pick-me-up on down days. Those who can find things to be grateful for, especially in challenging times, have stronger immune systems and a more positive outlook, both of which help us cope with difficulties and develop resiliency.
Be a container of compassion. When others try your patience, the quickest path to harmony is compassion. Compassion is the ability to relate to other’s suffering without judgement. Look at the situation from their perspective. People who give and receive compassion have stronger immune systems, experience less pain and suffering, and bounce back faster from setbacks and hardships. Self-compassion is critical here too. Taming your inner critic and showing yourself compassion advances acceptance and resilience.
Foster flexibility. Suffering is the inability to accept what is. You won’t always like what you’re faced with, but acceptance it is the first step to healing. Judgement, criticism and comparison make things worse. Expecting things to be just as they were is unrealistic, accentuates suffering, and keeps you from making necessary changes. Finding flexibility means removing rigidity. Seek ways to create some measure of happiness each day. Practice living in the present moment to discover small pleasures each day. This spontaneously expands your capacity for joy and helps release daily struggles with greater ease. As your resiliency grows, you’ll also naturally begin to discern what’s most valuable to you going forward.
Practice forgiveness. Let go of old resentments or transgressions. Studies show those who practice forgiveness experience less stress, lower their blood pressure, feel less pain, and find greater satisfaction in life. Forgiveness is actually a greater gift to yourself than to the transgressor. Often the person who wronged you has long forgotten the offense while you marinate in the hurt. Letting go serves you well. Remember too that most people are simply trying to do their best in tough times, so have patience.
Create intentional downtime. Whether you spend it reading, reflecting, praying or meditating, quiet time is crucial to building resiliency. There’re no right or wrong way to do it - just begin. Schedule alone time whether you’re an introvert or an extrovert. Banish expectations and simply practice being in the stillness, honoring whatever comes up for you. You’ll find you benefit much more than expected.
Celebrate the small stuff. Find big and little reasons to celebrate each day. Encourage those in your circle to do the same. It lifts spirits and creates a playful, easy atmosphere in the home where we’re all spending much more time. Focusing on the good versus the imperfect is a healthy way to strengthen relationships and create more harmony. Do things that make you laugh every day.
These practices definitely help you align with your true self and will create a resilience reservoir you can draw from on difficult days. Accept the messiness of life, allow yourself to stumble and get back up again. These days we have plenty of opportunities to practice. Adopt a resiliency mindset and nothing will hold you back!