For the past few weeks, I have been the recipient of repeated hurtful actions and when I communicated my feelings with each perpetrator, the same response was offered, “It wasn’t my intention.” The frequency and flippancy of this explanation has gotten me to thinking about accountability, and whether intentions or actions should be the guide by which we measure relationships and outcomes.
Making friends is tough. It takes time, trust, and a little bit of luck. Thanks to Facebook, the word ‘friend’ has taken on a new meaning. What was once reserved to describe special people in our life, is now used to describe just about everyone in our life. But, do all of these people live up to the definition of a true friend? Or, are they merely acquaintances from which we expect so much more?
I’m often amazed at people who feel they are more important than others. Those who believe that their wealth, status, or whatever circumstance they create in their mind, entitles them to special treatment or reverence that others do not receive. These people tend to treat others in a subservient manner.
When we look back at all the people who have lived before us and all that will live after, it’s easy to see that we are nothing more than a dot on the line of humanity, and that each one of us is a part of the line, no greater than another, and reliant on each other. No matter who you are or what you’ve achieved, you are a part of the line, connected to other human beings.
I recently turned 56 years old. 56 YEARS OLD! Like most other 50-something-year-old individuals, I’m not sure how this happened – it feels like a blink of an eye. One day I’m a college girl, the next a young mother, and now more than one half a century old. How can I be over 50? Most days I feel, think and act like a 24-year-old, so I know it’s only a number, but when that AARP membership card arrives.
When I was growing up, I thought 50-plus women were old; they were on the downside of life. Or were they??? I know I’m not the first half centurion to say age is only a number. We have to say that, right? Growing older can be a challenge. We must work hard at looking good, keeping our mind sharp, and maintaining our weight and health. Nothing comes naturally anymore.
Do you often think about doing something different or implementing a new idea only to allow fear to stop you dead in your tracks without giving the opportunity a try? Do you frequently conjure up a list of reasons to be inactive, why you shouldn’t try or can’t accomplish something?
All too often we build roadblocks to personal and professional success because we allow fear to be a governing force in our life.
Recently, I had the privilege of interviewing for the second time, an incredibly inspiring man, Sean Swarner, who went beyond the bounds of being human and not only faced his fears, but conquered them!
In his teen years, Sean was diagnosed two times with different, unrelated end-stage cancers, and each time he was not expected to live for more than a few weeks. He underwent rigorous treatment, which included the removal of one lung. Throughout his ordeal, Sean wasn’t sure if he would live and he wondered about the future quality of his life. He astounded the medical community when he survived both diseases. But, he didn’t just survive, he emerged stronger than anyone could have imagined!
How many times has someone told you that he or she was going to do something and then it never materialized? How many times have you promised something to another only to let that person down?
Promises are powerful. They are given to fulfill a need of another. When someone makes a promise it is usually made with the best of intentions and in that moment, the person believes that he or she will be able to complete the offer. Then the person goes off like a busy little bee, involved in the tasks of daily life, and his or her words become a distant memory.
The problem is that the recipient of a promise remembers every word said. Often, spoken words are a life jacket to a drowning person and that person clings to them for survival.
One of the questions that I am often asked by email, via Facebook, or during my lectures, is how to permanently end a relationship with someone that is a negative force in a person’s life. I have heard many terms to describe these types of people, but one of my favorites is energy vampire, because the person zaps the life out of you.
A relationship doesn’t have to be romantic to fall into the toxic category.
Ending a relationship can be one of life’s greatest challenges. We all have a few people in our lives that we allow to treat us in a manner less than we deserve. Cognitively we know that if we don’t change something, the result will be the same, but once that music starts, we jump right into the same old dance.