Developing mental strength was the topic of conversation that I recently had with Amy Morin, author of the 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do series. To be honest, up until a few years ago, I never thought about mental strength or the role it played in my life. I just lived, moment to moment, blindly existing. It wasn’t until my life literally imploded and I came out the other side that I started to wonder how I made it through those challenges, relatively unscathed.
“If you’re happy and you know it clap your hands, if you’re happy and you know it clap your hands, if you’re happy and you know it and you really want to show it if you’re happy and you know it clap your hands”
Thinking about this song brings back joyous memories of dancing around my family room singing it with my children and perhaps, even having it sung to me as a child. The lyrics are simple and yet so profound – if you’re happy and you know it, show it (feel it, live it, experience it).
This past weekend I tried something that I had never done before. One of my friends invited me to a Tarot card party where an expert would offer private readings. Intrigued, I agreed to attend. During my reading, the woman said something that really struck a nerve with me; she told me that I don’t know when I’m happy.
Interestingly, this thought has been on my mind ever since I interviewed Dr. Rick Hanson, the author of Hardwiring Happiness. As a result of our discussion, I have been contemplating whether or not I truly feel happiness.
If you believed you could achieve anything, what would you do? Would you be living the same life?
Recently, I had the opportunity to speak with former pro-wrestler, Diamond Dallas Page, who didn’t get to the top of his game until he was at an age when most are getting ready to retire.
Despite physical injuries early in his career that forced him to take time off from wrestling, Dallas later returned to the profession and against all odds, became a champion! There were a million reasons why he should have given up, but he didn’t accept any of them.
Dallas believes that there is no place for excuses when you want to achieve a goal, and that when you truly believe you can accomplish it, there is no stopping success!
Recently, a friend who was contemplating separating from her husband gave me a call and asked my advice. A few years ago when my emotions were spinning out of control and I was in the throes of my marriage breakdown, I would have shouted, “Divorce the bastard!”
Now, six years post-divorce, I have gotten off the emotional rollercoaster called relationship breakdown and a cooler head prevails. My advice to her: slow down, you move too fast!
Have you ever had the opportunity to meet someone and before you met had an expectation of what you thought would occur or how that person would behave? It’s natural to worry about how an encounter will play out, especially if it is with someone you admire. It’s easy to make judgements based on assumptions, but I have found that more often than not, assumptions are wrong.
How many times has someone told you that he or she was going to do something and then it never materialized? How many times have you promised something to another only to let that person down?
Promises are powerful. They are given to fulfill a need of another. When someone makes a promise it is usually made with the best of intentions and in that moment, the person believes that he or she will be able to complete the offer. Then the person goes off like a busy little bee, involved in the tasks of daily life, and his or her words become a distant memory.
The problem is that the recipient of a promise remembers every word said. Often, spoken words are a life jacket to a drowning person and that person clings to them for survival.
One of the questions that I am often asked by email, via Facebook, or during my lectures, is how to permanently end a relationship with someone that is a negative force in a person’s life. I have heard many terms to describe these types of people, but one of my favorites is energy vampire, because the person zaps the life out of you.
A relationship doesn’t have to be romantic to fall into the toxic category.
Ending a relationship can be one of life’s greatest challenges. We all have a few people in our lives that we allow to treat us in a manner less than we deserve. Cognitively we know that if we don’t change something, the result will be the same, but once that music starts, we jump right into the same old dance.
Waking up to reports of people being gunned down while enjoying a night out sickens me. It sickens me like every other horrific, tragic story we have heard before.
I don’t understand what is happening; it seems like our world is upside down. I don’t pretend to have the answers. I don’t how we got here, but we have arrived. All I do know is that we must do what is within our power to enact change, even if it is only within our small piece of the world.
We live in a fast paced world, seldom taking the time to catch our breath. Add to the general stress of life, a significant event such as losing a loved one, getting fired from a job, going through a divorce, or another difficult situation, and you have a recipe for emotional overload. Emotional overload keeps us in a continual state of stress and stress can wreak havoc on our system. While it is normal to feel sad, lonely, and/or scared at times, it’s important to pay attention to our feelings and take action when necessary.
Are you someone that dwells on what is missing or went wrong in your life? Do you whine and complain about your problems? Do you believe that you’ve been dealt a bad hand? Or, are you someone who sees the beauty in every situation, counts your blessings, and has decided that you will live your life in gratitude?
Gratitude is defined as a feeling of thankfulness and appreciation. To be grateful is a mindset, a conscious decision that we make.
Recently, I had the privilege of speaking with an extraordinary woman, Colleen Alexander, who exemplifies the power of the human spirit and the ability to find the good in any circumstance.
In 2011 while bicycling home from work, Colleen was run over and dragged by a freight truck. The accident left her body ripped apart and shattered into pieces as she clung to life. Her survival would be a miracle; she flat lined multiple times as EMTs, doctors, surgeons, and nurses worked ferociously to save her.