I Choose Happy!

According to Terry Orbuch, PhD, there are more than 100 million single adults in the United States today and four out of every 10 were already married once. Close to 50 percent of married people will become single again before the age of 50 – either through divorce or death.

Close to 50 percent of married people will become single again before the age of 50!

This statistic is staggering. Almost half of all people that were once a couple, will find themselves alone before the age of 50, either through divorce or death. So why, if there are so many single people out there, does someone feel like he or she is the only single person in the world? Why do we equate “singleness” with failure, inadequacy, or aloneness? Why must we find our “Prince Charming” or “Princess” in order to live happily ever after?

When my marriage came to an end, I found myself in uncharted waters; I had to embark on my new life journey as a single adult with no direction. I experienced feelings of grief, loss, rejection, anger, guilt, disappointment, and fear that I would be destined to spend the rest of my life alone and that I would never be able to trust again.

My feelings were normal and part of the recovery process. I allowed myself to feel them. But there came a time when I needed to make a choice: let those feelings define me or choose to be happy.

I chose happy!

I chose not to dwell on the situation or allow it to dictate my life.

I chose to use that experience as a catalyst to look inside myself to see who I really am – an opportunity for self-exploration and growth. What makes me tick? What do I want to achieve in life? Who do I want to be when I grow up?

I chose self-esteem over self pity.

I chose forgiveness over vindictiveness.

I chose to experience life, not just go through the motions.

As I have moved through the past few years and have learned about myself, I feel rejuvenated, almost reborn, and for the first time in a long time, I am excited about what may lie ahead.

It’s not easy – it’s a daily struggle. But once you make the choice to be happy … you will be! And maybe your Prince Charming will arrive … or maybe not.

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